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sibling jealousy

Surrogate Sisterhood

July 10, 2011 by sue campbell

Nora’s fed up with this no baby sister nonsense.

About a month ago, she threatened to kidnap a baby. Her friend Ruby was expecting a little sibling at any moment. I asked Ruby if she thought she was getting a little brother or a little sister. Nora interrupted, “If it’s a girl, I’m going to steal it,” she deadpanned. “For real.” Poor Ruby looked horrified.

Saturday night, rather than sleep, Nora had an all out break down over the injustice of it all. “It’s not fair,” she complained. “I really want a baby sister.”

“Well, when you’re a grown up, you can have all the babies you want.”

“But that won’t be a sister.” Nothing gets past this kid.

“But if I had a baby now, there’s no guarantee it would be a girl. It could be a baby brother.”

“Well, I don’t want that. Maybe somebody else will give their girl to us.”

“Most people want to keep their babies. I don’t think you’re going to find someone to give you a baby.”

This brought on racking, angry sobs. “But it’s not fair! You get to have a sister!”

“You’re right, it’s not fair. Hey, tomorrow, do you want me to call aunt Rachel and ask her if she’ll be your sister, too?”

“Yeah,” she sniffed.

“Okay, we’ll give her a call.”

First thing Sunday morning, Nora said, “Do you remember last night when I was angry about not having a sister?”

“Yes, I do.”

“Can we call Rachel?”

So we called my sister in Minnesota. I put her on speaker phone.

“Hey, Rach. Listen, um, Nora’s really upset about not having a sister, so I told her I’d call and ask if you’d be her sister, too.”

“Sure, I can do that. Nora, do you want to be the big sister or the little sister?”

“Big sister.”

“Okay, I’ll be the little sister. I have lots of practice at that. It’s settled then. You’ll be my big sister and I’ll make sure all parties on this end are informed.”

She meant Nora’s uncle, cousins and grandparents. Or I guess, now that they’re sisters, it would be Nora’s brother-in-law, nephews and parents?

I’m so confused. But it’s a lot simpler than having another baby.

Filed Under: Complete Nonsense Tagged With: one and done, preschool negotiations, sibling jealousy, surrogate siblings

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What kind of blog is this?

This is a blog for PARENTS. True, the writer, Sue Campbell, writes books for kids. But this blog is for grown-ups. It has some swearing and would be super boring for kids. Except for the swearing.

The PODCAST is for KIDS and PARENTS. In fact, my twelve-year-old daughter is my co-host.

If your kids like Sue's books, send them over to suecampbellbooks.com where there's some kid-friendly content. EVEN BETTER, join the mailing list. You get stuff for grown-ups and printable stuff for kids. And sometimes there will be super ill-advised giveaways or coloring contests for free books.

MORE ABOUT SUE: She makes an ACTUAL LIVING from writing words and marketing books and lives with her husband, two daughters, six chickens and one messy house rabbit in Portland, Oregon. And yes, Portland IS that weird. She really couldn't be any luckier.

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