Mommy's Pen

A writer's notes on family

Potty Training: A Crazy (Yet Effective) Approach

by

Last May, my daughter started showing interest in using the potty. She liked reading stories about kids using the potty, she liked sitting on her chair. However, she wasn’t making any deposits. Several times a day, she would drag me to the bathroom and I’d pull her pants down so she could sit. And sit. And sit. She was missing a piece of the puzzle.

Then I got an idea, a wonderful, awful idea.

I am rather a small person and not well endowed in the buttocks region, so I lowered myself onto her little potty chair and peed. Then I showed her the results. Her little eyes widened and she smiled in comprehension. I dumped and rinsed the potty and she sat down and peed. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding!

Obviously, for you J-Lo types, this approach is not practical. And, of course, some of you will just think I’m looney. However, the lesson here is that sometimes little ones need to see how something works, as their language skills just aren’t at a place where a verbal explanation is going to help. In such cases, show, don’t tell. It’s just crazy enough to work.

Seven Minute Clean-Up: Housekeeping for the Energy Challenged

by

Is your livingroom strewn with toys? Are there dirty clothes on the bathroom floor? Does the garbage need to be taken out? Does the dishwasher need to be unloaded and immediately reloaded? Would you rather be laying in a lump on the couch than doing anything about it?

Allow me to introduce seven minute clean-up. It’s a little technique my husband and I developed back in our childless days, before we even knew what a messy house looked like or what it meant to be truly exhausted. Basically, when you hate that the house is a mess but don’t have the energy for serious cleaning, you shout “Seven minute clean-up!” and set a timer, then everyone in the house cleans their butts off for exactly seven minutes. As soon as the timer goes off, everyone stops cleaning and (hopefully) assumes a vegetative state.

The beauty of this technique is that no reasonable person can refuse to lend a hand for only seven minutes and it really can make the house look better fast, thereby decreasing the guilt involved in laying around doing nothing. I know, genius. You’re welcome.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With:

Garden Calendar: February

by

Here in the Willamette Valley, it's already time to plant peas. Throw
some rainboots and grubby clothes on your kiddos and head outside. We planted a packet of organic peas right next to the chicken run. Starting after February 15th, you can plant peas about every two weeks for a continous supply of fresh peas later this spring. Don’t work the soil too much this time of year as the soil is still very wet. If you have an existing plot, just rake a small area, add some organic fertilzer and plant your peas about an inch deep and an inch and a half apart. If you don’t have an existing plot, I’d recommend planting in pots if you want to start early. If you work the soil before the ground has dried out, you’ll end up with unbreakable clumps.

Your toddler can open seed packets, put seeds in the holes, and cover the holes with dirt. Little ones also love working the hose. This is a good time to practice detaching from perfection; kids will compact dirt you just cultivated, throw seeds all over the ground, cover themselves in dirt and drench themselves in water. It’s okay, seeds are cheap and baths are fun.

Saturday Feature: Mistakes

by

Every Saturday I bring you a parenting mistake my husband and I have made. Please have a laugh or cry at our expense — we really are good parents, I swear.

For Daddy/Daughter Day, my husband planned a trip to the Lego store.  A 9:20am departure was arranged to get there by 10:00am.  This would provide about an hour of shop and play time.  Nora would fall asleep on the way home in line with her usual naptime. 

En route, Nora showed signs of fatigue.  Ben attempted to keep her awake by making Lego-related conversation.  As he pulled into the mall parking lot, she was asleep.  Undeterred, he took her out of the carseat and into the mall, expecting her to awaken.  She did not. 

The purchase had been pre-decided, so Ben bought a dump truck set and carried his sleepy (and heavy) girl back to the car.  On the drive home, Nora woke and announced, “We’re going to the Legoland!”  He pulled to the side of the road and explained that she had fallen asleep and missed the experience.  He then presented her with the set of Legos.  Thankfully, there was no meltdown.  Total nap time?  30 minutes.  Chance at getting her back to sleep before bedtime?  Zip.

Next trip is planned for post naptime.

How to Push My Buttons: A Toddler’s Manual

by

Step 1.  Wake up several times during the night, then take an extra long nap, so you are rested and I am not. (Note: Skipping this step will dramatically reduce desired results.)

Step 2.  Employ any or all of the following techniques:

a. Repeat the same request 700 times after I’ve explained why it’s not possible or must wait.  Example: We are in the car and you say you are thirsty and need a glass of milk.  I say, “Ok, honey, we’re almost home and then I’ll get you some milk.”  This is your cue to chant, “Mommy, I’m thirsty and I want milk, Mommy I’m thirsty and I want milk…”

b. While I am preparing a meal, pull on my clothing and pick your feet off the ground.

c.  Wait until I am collapsed on the sofa, request a cuddle with me, commence squirming. 

d.  While we are reading stories in bed, lay on my right side and when you want a closer look at the book, hoist yourself up and dig your left elbow into my right breast. 

e.  After I’ve taken you potty and tucked you into bed, call to me that you need to go potty again.  Pee a teaspoon.  Repeat.