Meet Charlie, the new guy. We got him in September, when the dog-lessness of our house became unbearable (to two-thirds of us).
He is a cuddle bug. With the world’s longest tail. (18 inches. Ben measured.)
But he has some issues.
He’s a rescue, and as such, he classifies the entire world into two categories: things to eat and things to fear. We’re working through it all, but it’s a lot of, well, work.
Sometimes, we don’t do such a great job of keeping on top of his needs. As every responsible dog owner knows, doggie mistakes are really human mistakes.
Which brings me to:
A non-exhaustive list of things Charlie has eaten, chewed, defecated on, vomited on or otherwise destroyed since his adoption:
(Really, this list should really be in a big globby paragraph — Salinger style — but in this internet age we need bulleted lists or our little heads might explode.)
- Living room rug (soiled)
- Replacement living room rug (chewed)
- Hallway rug (chewed)
- Nora’s mattress (vomited on)
- Food dispensing rolling toy (chewed threads on cap, rendering it useless)
- Replacement food dispensing rolling toy (chewed threads on cap, rendering it useless)
- Harness (chewed right off of himself)
- Countless hair ties (eaten)
- Beeswax (eaten)
- Fire wood (eaten)
- Wads of wool batting (eaten)
- Upstairs wall to wall carpeting (soiled)
- Sheets (chewed)
- Dog bed (chewed and shredded)
- Replacement dog bed (chewed and shredded)
- Slippers (chewed)
- Binder for storing film negatives (peed on)
- Pink plastic headband (eaten)
- Rain boots (chewed)
- Miniature garden (chewed)
- North Face sleeping bag (peed on)
- Sweater sleeve (eaten)
- Wicker basket (chewed)
- Duvet cover (chewed)
And all this has occurred even with the judicious use of baby gates and a considerably bully stick budget.
Miraculously, none of these ingestion events have landed him in the emergency room. But if one ever does, we had the good sense to get pet health insurance this time.
As most of you know, Charlie has big shoes to fill. An eight-year-old well trained purebred lab he is not. He’s just a year old, full of energy and uncertain of the world. But with lots training and lots of love, he’ll grow into the role of steadfast companion.
Speaking of growing, in the short time we’ve had him, he’s gone from fifty-five pounds to over seventy. Which leads me to worry, perhaps he’s growing into the tail?