Ben will tell you I blew up the microwave. But it’s a tough case to make given that I wasn’t even home.
Just before I left for my parent council meeting on Tuesday, Nora was asking for popcorn. I went to the kitchen and looked for the plain paper bag I had used for the last batch. It was gone, but I found a brown paper bag from the Safeway deli.
“Just throw a third of a cup of kernels in a paper bag, roll up the end and use the popcorn button on the microwave. But be careful and test this bag by itself before you do it. It has writing on it and might catch fire.”
See? I explicitly warned him.
When I returned three hours later, the microwave was nowhere in sight. The kitchen was spotlessly clean and there were fans set up all over the kitchen.
“Did you guys blow up the microwave?” I asked as I entered the bedroom.
“I didn’t blow up the microwave. It was your dumb idea.”
“It worked for me just fine the other day. I guess you have to use a plain paper bag.”
“I couldn’t shut it off fast enough. It caught fire immediately and there was a terrible chemical smell.”
“What the hell do they put in that ink? Metal?”
“And Nora was really sad that she didn’t get any popcorn.”
Remember the days when a paper bag was just a paper bag? And you couldn’t be blamed for things that happened while you were off the premises?